Monday, August 2, 2010

Taking a Breath

This morning, I got up before the chickens, and am sitting here listening to the vocal stylings of a my house. I am not particularly superstitious, but I don't kill crickets. Since I also don't handle crickets to actually get them out of my house, I suppose that he and I have somewhat of an understanding.

In the early hours...when I wake up before I am supposed to...I often have something that is on my mind. Today that seems to be the case, I suppose. We're at the beginning of a new month, I have a lot in front of me at work today, and I have finally accepted the fact that Jill is back in Tuscaloosa for another school year. Recruitment (rush) workshop starts today...and then she moves into her new apartment this week. She left last Thursday...and spent the past few days moving various people into their new spaces. I cannot believe that she is now beginning her junior year of college. It seems like yesterday that we were moving her in for her freshman year. And then her sophomore year. It really does go by fast. Next year, I could be dropping both of my children at college unless Brian stays home his first year to attend a local college (hopefully on scholarship) as he is considering doing right now.

But what is on my mind today (other than this apparently ticked of cricket that is like seriously LOUD) is the fact that I'm getting that incredibly annoying letdown feeling that often comes after a really busy season of activity. Kind of like the day after Christmas or something. I've rushed and spent myself into oblivion, and I'm really too tired to reflect on how much we enjoyed everything...or to clean up the rest of the mess. I've told myself that I'm not doing anything until Big Dave loads up her stuff on Wednesday and gets it out of my living room. Then I will have a place to put all of the "stuff" that has been in her room...and my room...for the majority of the summer so I can sort it out and figure out what to do with it.

I've been so incredibly busy for the past month that I've not nurtured friendships properly, have not rested enough, and have been focused on so many things at once, that I hardly feel that I am doing anything adequately...much less well.

But now I have no will to finish the job. This is so unlike me. I want everything straight and in its place...but I'm also equally content to just step over it for now.

I'm not depressed or anything. I actually have a lot to look forward to...a few days in Tuscaloosa with Jill during Rush Week, a busy week at work (which will make it pass quickly), a bridal shower at the end of the month for my sweet niece who is getting married in October, and of course...SEC Football. I suppose that life is like that. Seasons of ridiculous activity followed by periods where we want to curl up and sleep for three days...or a week. But there is always something to look forward to...always something just around the corner.

So today I am going to just pull myself up to do just what is in front of me today. I know that I have to get my house in order...laundry washed...bills paid...sleep deficit addressed. This feeling of being overindulged with entertainment and activity will end soon enough...and will gel into the fond memories of the Summer of 2010.

A summer when I walked on the beach discussing my kid sister's upcoming nuptuals with her.

When I watched my precious niece and nephew snorkel around my swimming pool and greet me with enthusiastic requests for more "sweet tea."

When I spent a weekend in Pine Mountain, Georgia with girls I knew when I was young...including actually learning the "electric slide" and joining in some karaoke...which means that I can mark that off of the "bucket list."

When I watched my daughter with a new boyfriend who just makes her happy along with realizing that she has good friends all over the southeast that she met at University of well as those from home.

When I saw my son achieve a good score on his ACT and a start displaying a sense of maturity which signals that he too will one day leave my home.

When I watched my beautiful daughter on the arm of her Daddy curtseying to a crowd of friends and family as a debutante. Her sweet friends were presented with her, and others friends were there to witness it all.

When I spent time with friends who remind me of the best things that life has to offer.

When I helped a friend attack her "upstairs" so that she could open her home to a young girl who needed a place to stay.

And when I heard one of the Rush songs sung by a choir of girls twenty six generations of Phi Mus removed from me...and got chill bumps on my arm remembering my younger self.

And now as I sit here preparing to move my daughter (again), wait to take my son to purchase new school uniforms because he has outgrown everything, and eagerly anticipate Rush week...when I'll be staying in Tuscaloosa for a mini-vacation.

I just love mini-vacations.

I just stepped outside a few minutes ago because my dogs were insisting that they be let back in...and pulled two gardenia blooms off of the bushes outside my window. My gardenias have bloomed twice each year...once in May and in August since my grandmother died in 2004. Her birthday was August 5th. She is also on my mind today. Actually, she is on my mind most days at some point.

In a few days, the cricket will probably be quiet, and my life will have settled back into its normal routine. That comforts me somewhat...but also makes me feel a little sad. Sometimes life comes at us so fast that we can scarcely take it all in. I suppose that's where I've been lately...and I am looking forward to a little room to breathe.

After all...Christmas will be here before we know it.

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