Today has been one of those days. Not horrible. Not even particularly noteworthy. It has just been "not fun." Oh, I had fun at lunch with two friends and some great phone conversations tonight that made the day worth getting up and breathing through, but overall...it was not my favorite.
Come to think of it...2010 has really not been my favorite year either. It has had its highlights...and I'm grateful for every blessing, gift, and memory that is of the positive persuasion. I attended three family weddings this year, got to hold my precious new great-nephew, vacationed at Inlet Beach, visited Austin, Texas, saw my cousin from Pennsylvania, watched University of Alabama win a National Championship, and celebrated my 25th wedding anniversary. I watched my daughter finish her sophomore year of college and get halfway through her junior year. She was presented at a ball in July, turned 20, jumped up and down at another great pledge class for her sorority including three great girls from Montgomery, and introduced us to a few new faces that have since come and gone. My son began his senior year of high school, grew taller than his sister (and heavier), was accepted to three colleges of his choice (Alabama, Auburn and AUM), and managed to amaze me with his ability to save and take care of his needs AND wants.
Yeah, now I feel bad whining about 2010.
Anyway, the year has had its lowlights as well. Most have come out miraculously well, but some have kept me wishing for a different outcome. But life is life. It is what it is. And sometimes what it is...totally does not rock.
There will be people that I will not receive Christmas cards from this year because they are celebrating Christmas in heaven. There are folks that I've welcomed in my home that I likely will never lay eyes on again because breakups are like that. There are people who have experienced illness, tragedy, and life-altering news that will forever mark the year 2010 into their consciousness.
And this week...I've had a headache...a restlessness...and exhaustion all combined to make me declare that I am sincerely ready to see 2010 ride into the sunset. And as a parting thought..."may the door hit ya...where the good Lord split ya." Just sayin'.
Surely 2011 will be better.
Maybe this will be the year that the resolutions get kept, the wrongs are righted, and all will be swell with the world. World peace? A noble concept, but highly unlikely. Having no major drama? I vote for that.
I want this to be the year where the people I've upset through the years realize that although I have my moments of being unbearable...I really do mean well.
I tend to want happy endings more than the average person and actually need to know that somebody out there is living the fairytale. I need to know that life is working out for everyone in some capacity. And most importantly, that it is working out for my children. As it is said by my friend..."A mother is only as happy as her most unhappy child." So, I want this to be the year of the fairytale for at least one of them.
This year, I want to hope for the best, but have been disappointed so often that I can almost scarcely dare to hope anymore. I'm tired of taking the crumbs of delight...I want to sit at the banquet table. I want to have a spirit that is so full of joy and appreciation that disappointment cannot find a place to roost anywhere near me.
I want to spend this year being sincerely grateful for how blessed I am without having to be reminded through tragedy, loss, or other drama. I would like to do without those for awhile..or possibly forever.
I want to make an honest effort to resolve a couple of things in my life that absolutely, positively must be dealt with...or I'm just not going to be happy. Nothing earthshattering...but definitely overdue.
I really want to make a difference...but have almost convinced myself that this is not why I am on the planet. May I make a small difference to someone every day.
May I spend the coming year making some attempt at using my God-given abilities every day.
If you think about it, though, many of these are completely out of my control.
So, what is within my control is the following list. It is my resolution list for 2011. I plan to do one of these each month and will write about the experience when it is over. I'm just not so sure what will be done when...I'm just going to let the Spirit lead me. I don't know if I can commit to a year...but I can commit to a month. I hope so anyway. So here goes...
2. Notes of affirmation
3. Cleaning for one hour
4. Memorizing scripture
5. Service to others
6. Nothing but water to drink
7. Giving something away - decluttering
9. No eating out
10. Learning something new
11. Giving anonymously
12. Healthy eating
Obviously, I'm not going to try to do #12 in December, or #6 in January when I'm living off of decaffeinated coffee because I have a vendetta against Alabama Power Company and refuse to turn on my heat. I'll just surprise you...and probably myself...by letting you know what I did...after it was over.
Happy New Year! May 2011 be a wonderful year of blessing, health and happiness. Here's hoping...