Monday, September 28, 2009

WHAT?

There are some things in life that are so out there...so beyond the pale...or just so bizarre...that we go WHAT? Using the word "WHAT?" seems to be like taking "really?" to the third power...or the tenth...depending upon the situation.

I know that sometimes when I have uttered WHAT? I've actually been incredulous...or I just didn't trust my hearing after teenage years blasting AC/DC and Foo Fighters finishing me off on the iPod of late. I would hear a snippet of something that sounded either too good to be true or too horrible to imagine. Like when you find out some unexpected news or get the results of a tryout or interview. But those are extremes of the whole WHAT? spectrum, and what I am really talking about is quite frankly...the bizarre.

This past week I had the pleasure of spending a little bit of time with my scrapbooking ladies group. I was trying to place pictures of my dog, Rebel, on a page in a manner that looked somewhat interesting and was failing miserably. So, my focus broke and shifted from the page to the words that were being spoken by other people in the room. Words like "Mercedes on blocks" all strung together like that. And I went WHAT?

Yes. It actually happened in the the thriving metropolis of Prattville, Alabama. My friend's Mercedes was on blocks (or more officially...jacks) in her yard. Her late model Mercedes. Did I mention that she lives on the main drag through town? Or that the local football team was on ESPN-U playing a team from up North somewhere that was a big hairy deal? Or that some big shot from Mercedes (the company...not the dealership) just happened to be in town and witnessed said vehicle? Oh...but yes. All true.

The Mercedes big whig reportedly stated, "we normally don't see our owners doing their own maintenance..." as he spotted the car. And the owner? Oh, she's totally mortified. But she was not budging on spending money she didn't have available, and was willing to wait to replace her tires. Her husband then got a deal and ordered some new rims or tires or something from eBay and was waiting for them to arrive. In the meantime...Mercedes on blocks (jacks).

And the Northerners who were in town from Connecticut or somewhere up there now have confirmation (and probably photographic evidence) that Jeff Foxworthy is totally not lying about those of us born and bred in the South. And as for me...I just found the whole thing totally Depends-worthy.

Today...as I was listening to reports that Iran is testing missles, I hear that our President is headed to Copenhagen (where is that...Denmark?) to speak to the International Olympic Committee to get the Olympics for Chicago with Oprah Winfrey. Excuse me, but WHAT?

Just a few minutes ago, I got a text from my daughter. She is going to dinner with her ex-date to a big formal affair and her current date to said formal, her roommate, and her roommate's date. I got wind of this and went WHAT? After two weeks of intense drama that culminated in one party telling one of the two parties involved to quit being a "horse's ass" (sorry, but it happened)...everyone is going to break bread together. There is only one word for this and it is WHAT?

So...I'll just sit here baffled at the funny twists and turns that life takes and will try to simply remain calm in the process. My plans for tonight were to balance my checkbook. Hope I don't have a WHAT? moment there! Later!

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