Entitlement

Today, Big Dave, Brian and I are driving to Tuscaloosa, AL today to the University of Alabama campus. Our purpose is to deliver Jill's new (to her) 2006 silver Equinox. She has been driving my sister (Linda's) Miata since turning 16 three years ago. We all love the Miata, and now want to bring it home to be a "fun" car for us. I mean, how else will I ever get a convertible otherwise?

The road to Tuscaloosa from Montgomery is approximately 2 1/2 hours on a two lane (most of the way) road. There are frequent accidents on this road due to logging trucks, 18 wheelers, rednecks, and basic collegiate stupidity. Because of this, we have actually been able to keep our baby girl in Tuscaloosa and not home every weekend. We also didn't think that she needed a new vehicle when she was living on campus...and the Miata was easy to park, and when gas was $4.00 a gallon...was a lifesaver.

To provide those of you who do not have the backstory to our life...we live near Montgomery, Alabama, and unless your child is ridonkulously smart and can blow out the magnet program (which is quite good)...you have to fund private school or have a strong enough stomach to play the odds and be prepared to raise your grandchildren while your kids are still in junior high. Although we'd like grandchildren one day...we thought it would be tougher raising kids and grandkids in the same house than scraping up tuition money...the amount of which is equal to college tuition, room and board at a state school...every year...since 1996.

So basically...college to us was just more of the same. Yes sir, may I have another, please? Or as we shorten it in our household...BOHICA (bend over...here it comes again.) You get the point.

The good news is that both of our children seem to have benefited from this investment. Jill was accepted to Troy University, Auburn University, and the one she actually chose...University of Alabama...where she is now a freshman. Brian is in the 10th grade...and unless his English teacher wants him to be home-schooled as may be borne out shortly at semester's end...he's doing okay. He's actually a straight A student masquerading as the laziest child known to man, but like me, he will probably snap out of it at some point in time.

The bad news is that a lot of people who my kids attend school with bought their kids brand new Volvos for graduation. WHAT THE?

I mean, come on people. What is to be gained in this? I drove a 1973 Mercury Comet with recap tires. I didn't feel unloved at the time (although now I wonder whether or not my parents had some insidious plot to just leave my survival in a blowout situation to chance). I was even impressed that the blue recap band on the tires matched my car. So what if the vinyl top was peeling off and it ran rougher than I feel after aerobics...it ran. And on the day it quit doing that...I sold it for $500, put that as a down payment on a 1978 Chevette...learned how to drive a stick shift...miraculously received financing at age 19 on my own...and moved on.

Someone remind me to elaborate on the Chevette at a later date. I used to tell people that I drove a 'vette. They thought it was great until they figured out that it was a CHEvette rather than a CORvette. I thought it was dang hilarious, though. It is my personal belief that you have not truly lived until you have at some point in your life owned a Chevette or its equivalent. Although in this day and age...I cannot possibly think of any such vehicle that excels so gallantly in the "unreliable", "mind of its own" and "rough riding" categories simultaneously short of an unbroken horse. There is simply no match in today's automotive market, anyway.

Anyway, our Jill has made her grades this freshman year, and has done everything that we have asked her to do since the 11th grade. Academically, I mean, and really not too far off in just about every other area as well. Well, she's still dating the same person and we thought she would be better off not dating just one person at this point in her life, but he's fine, so whatever. So, in spite of this one slight deviation from her parents' wishes, we finally decided to go ahead and get her something else to drive. She will be living off campus next year, and as I've already shared...we want the Miata for ourselves.

Actually, the whole process was accelerated because we're taking it to Pennsylvania on vacation next week. I know what you are thinking. These people are crazy. They bought a car instead of renting one. Well...yeah. There's no way I'm taking my ancient Honda Accord or Brian's 1997 Explorer even though both fulfill their purposes by getting us from Point A to Point B. Big Dave's truck is a "work vehicle" and is therefore...off-limits.

And just what rental company is going to lease a car to me that a 19 year old is also permitted to drive? Um...NONE. And I just cannot drive in certain circumstances anymore (road construction, heavy traffic, two lane roads) without excessive whining on my part. I nearly needed oxygen traveling recently from Montgomery to Atlanta because of road construction. I turned over the wheel to Jill, let my mother stay in the front seat chatting away with her while I was curled up in the fetal position in the backseat, with my eyes shut praying fervently that we wouldn't hit a concrete barrier with eighteen wheelers blowing by us at warp speed. She has nerves of steel. Ergo, the purchase.

So, where was I?

OH...entitlement. Yes. It is my fervent belief that most of what is wrong with kids today (and there is a lot right with them as well, but I'm not going there right now) is that there is this extremely annoying sense of entitlement that may have also existed in 1981, but I don't think so. At least it didn't at my house.

Most kids today have always had their own bathrooms or shared with a sibling at worst. Many of us grew up with one bathroom in the house.

They've had every birthday celebrated with an "event" and they get gifts for Valentine's Day, Easter, their birthday and Christmas. Christmas involves meeting every desire of their hearts no matter how stupid or shallow. This includes battery operated "Barbie cars", Coach purses, the entire collection of Beanie Babies, American Girl dolls and accessories, and cell phones at age 12.

One sweet friend has in the past two years sent her child to Europe for three weeks, to California to camp, skiing in Colorado, and on a cruise. Trust me...if mine want to be sent somewhere...they will have to figure out how to get themselves back. One trip a decade is more my speed.

We expect nothing in the way of chores, they think that granite countertops are standard, and denial of things like eyebrow waxing, highlighting, and tanning bed packages invoke modern day reenactments of the wearing of sackcloth and ashes.

I have frequently had friends lament this broad change in perspective with me. If we are to be believed, we worked, never asked for anything, and we didn't get designer clothes just because everyone else had them. Yeah, right. I just noticed all of the Lacoste alligators in the senior pictures in the yearbook. My kids didn't even believe me (because we couldn't possibly have been even remotely cool) until I whipped it out recently and showed them.

The difference was...that was the guys' best shirt in the picture...they didn't necessarily have one in every color. Ours do.

What I suppose I'm trying to say is this...we were humbled this week when after the 352nd phone call from Jill checking on our car-hunt progress she said that she was just so excited that we were doing this because she really had thought that we wouldn't because she still had a great car. I mean, she has basically been appreciative of what she had. So, as a result...we are very pleased to give her the keys today. We know she will take care of it because she's taken care of the Miata before it. So, we will pat ourseves on the back just a little which will make the car payments bearable for me. Never mind that she's moving into a brand new development with three of her sorority sisters that has a pool the size of our entire backyard (including a waterfall), a tanning bed, and workout room for her sophomore year...and our contribution was a new 40" television for the main room they'll be sharing (yes...it was on sale at Costco...floor model). Oh well. Later!