Family

My family is awesome.

And while that statement applies to many of my relatives, right now I am thinking specifically of the group of people that I just visited in Pennsylvania. But first...the backstory.

My mother's mother, for those of you who did not have the privilege to know her was Frances Middlebrooks. She lived in Thomaston, GA, was married to Harry Sr. and had three children: Jean (Mom), Harry, Jr. and Pitta. She had one sister...who was over 20 years younger...same parents...Mary Bird.

Aunt Mary Bird is six years older than my mother, and due to her father's early death, and the fact that she and her mother lived with my grandparents, she and Mom were raised more like sisters than the aunt and niece that they really were.

My grandmother adored her little sister. She spoke of her all of the time, was in communication with each of the three of Aunt Mary Bird's three children: Jan, Chip, and Kenneth, and kept us in the loop on their lives as well.

And while there was activity in their branch of the family including marriages, births of children, and an occasional divorce, we sat firmly in our little southeastern United States reality while they made every attempt to include us in every trip they made anywhere remotely close to our vicinity. Members of their branch of the family showed up for my wedding in 1985, my grandmother's 90th birthday in 1996, my grandmother's funeral in 2004 and my cousin Robin's wedding last summer (2008).

I remember standing with Jan in the lobby of Frazer (my church)...in 1989...both of us pregnant...me with Jill and she with Sean...only because she picked up the phone to let me know that she was there at a conference.

Sometimes, Gammy would tell me that one of the boys - Chip or Kenneth - had come by to visit, or Aunt Mary Bird was down, or would show me a picture of one of Jan or Chip's kids (Kenneth's and Danny's came along later...)

And what have we done through the years? Well, not much since my grandmother quit traveling sometime in her 80's...and this is unacceptable.

Last summer, as I was thoroughly enjoying the company of Jan, Carl (Jan's husband) and Aunt Mary Bird at Robin's wedding in Atlanta...I thought...exactly why is it that we have never traveled north? And so it became immensely important to me at that time to go.

And so...last week...we did.

We learned many wonderful things...like Aunt Mary Bird has a picture of her mother's mother (my great-great-grandmother) in her possession that is just incredible. She also makes unbelievably good cheese eggs and has turned me on to Luzianne coffee with chicory. Jan is a phenomenal cook...she put no fewer than fifteen different dishes together for dinner...all were spectacular...healthy...and beautifully presented as well as delicious. We met Danny's three children...who are precious...but "active" is an understatement. We spent time with Chip...and Sean...both of which were on their way to somewhere else the following day.

And while all of these were surprises...the biggest one was Jan's son, David. He just seems southern to me in a northern package. He invested time showing us around, listening to our craziness and actually laughing, and just being an all around great guy. We're trying to talk him into visiting us and hope that he will take us up on it. Luckily, he seems to think that we're funny instead of nuts. It's a thin line we walk...I'll admit. David is the one that looks like the Abercrombie model in the pictures on Facebook. He seems totally oblivious to this...which is a very attractive quality.

We missed Kenneth this trip...but we may descend upon his family and Chip's at a later date. If they are reading this...consider this a warning.

I suppose that all of us have family that we take for granted. We know that they are there...we care about them...and we know what is going on in a general way. And then we do something radical...like actually spending time together and realize what a true gift they are to us.

I would not trade the time we spent...although I do so wish that we had been in time to say goodbye to a fine man...Uncle Henry. But I also know that where he is right now...he knows that we finally made the trek.

So, for those of you who are out there reading this...my words to you today are these...go pick up the phone and call your family. Send a card...attend something you are invited to attend. Stay in touch. Put whatever it is that annoys you beyond belief behind you. Forgive. Forget. Move on from the unimportant. Remember that nothing that we are doing is as important as our family is. The only things on earth that we can take to heaven with us are people. Invest in them. Love them.

They might just surprise you. I know that we were pleasantly surprised...and hope that they were as well.

I am SO glad that we made the journey. We're far richer for it. And I hope that they know that they are welcome here...anytime. And...if they are brave enough to invite us to come visit again...I promise I won't delay another 20 years. Later!